WOMAN

In August South Africans celebrate Women’s month in honour of women from all backgrounds in South Africa who marched to the then Apartheid union Building in protest to women  not being allowed to own property. So on the 9^th of August every month we celebrate women’s day. That always helps me reflect on great women and what they have done for us and on WOMEN as a whole. Who are Women have always been strange creatures to me; I could never quite comprehend the complexity that is WOMAN. They did not make sense to me, I avoided them at all cost. I believe the women in my life had something to do with that. I found them unkind to say the least so I spent my childhood with men. From as young as I can remember, I was close to my dad and uncles and avoided my mom and aunts as much as I could. I found them unforgiving and judgemental. My dad and uncles were always there for me, always kind and giving, all things the women in my life weren’t.  Their mouths were like poison because whenever they said something, something inside me would die. So I found refuge in the men in my life.  I followed then around everywhere. Even in my adulthood, when I walk into a new place, I look for the “man of peace”. I will spot a man who resembles my dad or uncles and I would go there first, they never disappoint. I always feel safe and free around men and become guarded and insecure What is it about us women that make us so cruel to each other? Why do we see each other as enemies and rivals instead of sisters and comrades? Why can’t we protect each other like men do? Why do we always break each other instead of building each other? My husband and I always joke that men war physically but we war psychologically. A man aims to break another man’s body but we break souls. I speak of myself too. I’ve seen when I’m upset, I am like a vicious lion, I tear at everything in my way mercilessly and destroy everything moving. In proverbs14:1 the bible says “a woman can build her home or tear it up by her own hand” (rephrased). We have the power to build but it seems we choose the latter.  And we wonder why we’d rather be faithful to a cheating man than to each other. A woman would rather go after an unknowing mistress than turn on her unfaithful man. We always see each other as the problem, and we treat each other so badly.

The enemy is also using that to dismantle society because he knows the woman has the power to build or tear down. What kind of woman are you, and what kind am I? This month I’ve been on a prayer campaign for my mouth, that God uses it to build not tear up, to launch a full on psychological healing instead of warfare. That He uses our mouths to bring comfort and love to the world under our care. The Bible says the tongue has the power to build or destroy. God has created us to nurture. The enemy is trying to corrupt that, defile and pervert everything that is woman. Let us not let him deceive us like he deceived Eve; let us not allow him to break the force that is Women.  The curse has been broken over us; the blood of Jesus speaks a better word than we think of us. I am starting with the girl in the mirror. I’m determined to never let the enemy use my mouth to hurt anymore. I choose to use mine to build.  I also choose to renew my mind about women. I choose to let them in, regardless of the pain that might come with it.

As a way to build, we can do so much for each other. There are so many young women who need mentors, so many little girls who need mothers and sisters who will think of them the way God does. If girls would give each other compliments, they would not need to go to lying men. You can do something, you can make a difference. Ps Lisa Bevere opened my mind when she said she wanted to give to the next generation of women what women before us didn’t give us. You can be a Naomi to a little Ruth. All we need to do is use the weapons God gave us - our mouths, our warm embraces, our experiences and our love can build a new generation of women who trust and genuinely love each other. I want to be that woman; I want to build a generation of Proverbs 31 women who do not need to sell themselves short, because they have their sisters’ backing and cheering. I want to be that Woman. I know I can, can you?